Earlier today I was hit with a blow. It caused me great pain and it took nearly the whole day to sort out my inner self and forgive. Separation and divorce is a heart wrenching process. Strong emotions overtake normal thinking and peaceful days. I am grateful for the time alone to work through the uninvited intruder that rearranged my day. I expected alot and really looked forward to being with family and friends I love. Since I held on to this limited time and thought it to be the only day to be with family from north Florida and England before both leave next week, it offered the opportunity to forgive. I am grasping at straws perhaps; sure I still feel hurt. But I can see the dilemma his family had to make. Shun one to make the day a success. It was good that I was able to show my hurt in somewhat of a sloppy manner. If I were further on my spiritual path maybe I could have alleviated additional discomfort by doing the Eckart Tolle method of stating “Is it so?” therefore cutting myself out of the equation before my hurt got in the way.
I am practicing a forgiving heart. I release all pain associated from this day and forgive those who have shunned me for their own pleasure and pursuits. I am not this pain, I am love. I forgive, will learn this lesson by not repeating today’s outcome and walk with peace in my heart. I am not my past or my future. I am living in the moment. This moment is filled with love and peace. It is graced with forgiveness and gratitude. If those involved can’t see it, that is ok. That is not my concern. I love the person I am today. That is all that matters. The person I am today is kind, loving compassionate, caring, peace- filled, beautiful, God’s child, a child of love, a student of Universal wisdom. I can only become wiser, more compassionate and forgiving. I can only improve in all positive manners concerning my highest good. Unbeknownst to me, I had to go through this today. It was a crux of knowing my place within his family now that we are divorced. I made it through, a little battle worn, but tonight ready to move on.